Preface 

 Following the creation of the 1^st Edition of this book in 2011, it was appreciated that there was more material surfacing that would need a 2^nd edition. This was thought to have been completed a couple of years ago and then a further sweep of the archives turned up another few hundred letters. This find had a considerable impact in a number of ways. The emphasis of book centred on the wartime life of Joan Dibdin and he lover, later husband,  Tony Guise and also her brother Peter Dibdin. Amongst the letters where not only a complete set of love letters from Tony to Joan from the time of their meeting to his embarkation to India but also a number of letters between Peter Dibdin and Joan from the time of their being orphaned in 1933 until his death in 1943.

The letters from Tony were, for me, remarkable because not only did I acquire intense understanding of this father that I never knew but also considerable insight into the thinking and behaviour of my mother by extrapolation from information in his letters. The skill with which he managed live in the army, the drive for promotion and his relationships with his mother, sisters and Joan was quite remarkable.

The letters during the ten years relating to Peter, could be view as two sets, those following the tragedy of 1933 and those written during the war. The later set pointed to the need for considerable narrative about Peter’s life in his earlier years and also linked closely with those of his parents during the World War 1. The early letters between Joan and Peters gave vital insights into their lives after 1933 and expanded on my original short piece of work regarding their “traumatic Years”.

At the same time, hovering around, was the need to explore further the work of William Joseph Dibdin, in particular to publish his autobiography, and also cover some details of his offspring including his eldest son Lionel Aglio Dibdin, Joan and Peter’s father about whom I had considerable information including what seems like a complete set of letters from their first romantic encounter to their demise in 1933. As it was quite clear that the lives and deaths of their parents had considerable affect on Joan and Peter it seemed that this work had to be tackled while doing the work of bring up to date the 2^nd edition of this book.

Whereas this edition should be able to stand alone, the interested reader may like to look at the 3 volumes of “William Joseph Dibdin –A Glimpse into Three Generations. 1850-1945”

Regarding this up to date edition which has a second volume as an appendix containing letters, diaries and much else, there are those who may be concerned about the intrusion of studying in detail the letters and diaries of someone only one generation above. To those, I submit a few lines of consideration.

Joan Dibdin kept all her letters, diaries and documents with those of her family going back five generations. She had in recent years been through some of her letters and although never drawing any of them to my attention, many were kept in an orderly manner.

She could have destroyed all letters and diaries anytime up to her death, but she didn’t. Sadly, she had discussed little of her early life with me, however five years before her death when moving house and belongings, she pointed to her diaries and, seemingly jokingly, said that someone may want to write her biography.

At the time this was the very last thing I
 could image doing although I was beginning to find items of historic interest from the wider family that would need to be recorded for posterity.

A year before she died, she decided to inform me about the detailed timing of my conception, a titbit of information she had managed to bypass for sixty years. I had already, some 50 years before, established the logical sequence of dates and left it for her to raise the matter at a time of her choosing.

There is no doubt in my mind that the intricate knowledge that I have acquired through this study has not only given me immense insight into my own roots and nature but also given me an intense understanding of Joan and a tremendous respect for how she survived the second twenty years of her life. Parents always make mistakes, or often do, but any she made are completely understood in the light of her experiences and traumas in life and I get the feeling from the many letters she received and kept, that others that knew her recognised this at the time.  My personal sadness is that whereas she did all within her power to set me on the right path in life, she was unable to share with me those special enrichments that I would have had from the two exceptional people in her early life, her brother and her husband. In hindsight I realise that for her to have done this may well have been just too painful. The casual comment about Peter or Tony, her husband, was probably as much as she could manage after her second marriage until very much later on in her life and widowhood.

Amongst the last batch of letter found were 40 from a close friend of Joan’s at the time from a Tuberculosis Sanatorium in 1945 to 1946. A study of these not only give an graphical insight in the life in such a place and the treatment for TB at the time but also a new understanding of Joan in early widowhood at the age of 25 years old.

Raoul Guise 2023

Introduction